Tag Archives: childhood

As a Child, The Options Were Endless

dont disappoint yourself

I am 26 years old. I remember being little thinking those my age really had their shit together. “I’m going to have a nice car to drive around in and a beautiful house with a white picket fence for my gorgeous family to live in.” – just some of the thoughts I had when I was younger. I also thought I’d be married by now, maybe even have a kid.

Man, what little I knew back then. 

Now, I realize how much work is needed to achieve those things. You can’t just get married for the hell of it, which a lot seem to do now-a-days. Hey, you’ll get a ton of likes on Facebook and Instagram though, right? The sacred bond of marriage seems to have slowly dwindled away the past few years. Some couples jump right into it just to change their Facebook relationship status to “engaged.” And don’t even get me started on the cost of a wedding! Sheesh! If only I put money aside with those cut outs of wedding dresses when I was younger…

And the kid thing, everyone around me is having children. And don’t get me wrong, I am at that age now where this is supposed to happen. And it’s absolutely beautiful and I can’t wait to have my own little bundle of joy one day. But… just like marriage, it’s the cool thing to do. So many kids having kids and people expecting you to have them by a certain age!

Me? I want to be 150% okay with myself before bringing a child into this world. Why? Because they deserve me at my very best. And my twenties have been… well, a learning experience. I’ve changed and grown into someone who I’m in awe of at times. And others times I’m angry with myself, but it’s all a part of the growing process.

I am 26 years old and things did not pan out quite the way I thought they would. And that is okay. It’s okay! Things don’t always go as planned and that only means there is something else in store for you that you were not able to “plan” for.

Keep going and moving forward… no matter how slow you may think you’re moving, you’re still going forward, and forward is the right direction. 

Simpler Times

I think daily of my childhood

How simple everything was

In my eyes, anyway…

 

The world around me was probably busy corrupting

But I was a child who bled innocence

And I didn’t know rough times if they had hit me in the face

 

I find myself thinking of my home

The way the yard was set up as we played

The way my brothers face looked, untouched

I find myself thinking about how fast it went

Fearing that the rest of my life

Will fly fast as well

 

But next time, I want to look back on my life… with joy

Instead of wishing I was a child still

Instead of wishing all my responsibilities would wash away

 

I’m steady living in the past and future

Never really being in the present

That’s what I’ll regret the most when I look back

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